Terrible video games are nothing new. In fact, they were in large part the reason why the gaming market crashed in 1983. Every popular video game console throughout the market's history, whether it was the Nintendo Entertainment System or the modern day Steam market, became a testing ground for developers to experiment with what worked and what didn't. Sometimes, things worked out extremely well, and a genre-defining franchise was born. Other times, you get a title credited for helping bring down an entire industry, such as E.T on the Atari 2600.
However, since the crash and re-ignition of the video game market, E.T has become so notorious for its lackluster design and rushed development that it's become a sought-after collectible for many players. When a title becomes "so bad, it's good," all those flaws and frustrations that once irritated people to no end are eventually seen as hilarious gems.
With as many shovel-ware titles that appeared on systems such as the Wii and the Xbox 360, it's only a matter of time before they too become sought after by hardcore gamers. So, let's explore some recent titles that were so terribly created and rushed to market, that you just might have no choice but to play them in the foreseeable future.
8. Target Terror
Wii, Arcade
The name Konami used to mean something, but ever since the firing of Hideo Kojima and the cancellation of Silent Hills, Konami has become nothing but a laughing stock for their once substantial fan base. So, it seems fitting they would port this light gun arcade game to the Wii back in 2008. The reception was less than favorable to say the least, with IGN even granting the game a "Worst Visuals" award.
However, Target Terror holds a special place in my heart because it was a game my childhood friends and I played on a ski trip together. In the lodge, we found this game on an old arcade cabinet, and played it together for hours. The reason we loved it so much back then was because of how absolutely silly the game was. The visuals were indeed horrendous, with the backgrounds looking like something off of an 80's computer, and the bad guys you had to shoot were the least intimidating villains you could imagine. We even coined the term "suicide flasher" as one of the bad guys would rip open his overcoat to expose a suicide bomb.
Take it from me, this is a game you will love playing with your friends drunk for the outlandish humor alone.
7. Escape from Bug Island
Wii
Have you ever come across an awkward foreign adaptation that tries to imagine what a "fun" experience would be for Western audiences? Escape From Bug Island is just that. The dialogue is hilariously awkward, the enemies are lackluster, and just look at that giant gorilla boss. If that isn't enough to make you bust a gut laughing then I don't know what will.
Another example of "so bad, it's hilarious," Escape from Bug Island should fill whatever desires you have for experiencing something that literally makes you say "I can't believe someone thought this was a good idea."
6. Vampire Rain
PS3, 360
Splinter Cell meets vampires sounds like an excellent idea in theory, but what we got out of Vampire Rain was the exact opposite. If you thought Dark Souls was the most difficult game you could possibly get your hands on, Vampire Rain for the Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 is just for you!
The game was criticized for being unfairly difficult, with enemies early on having the ability to kill you in two hits while taking numerous hits to die themselves. Additionally, the stealth mechanics were busted beyond belief, adding further to the already insane difficulty.
With games like Dark Souls and Bloodborne becoming such a popular staple for the inner masochist in all of us, it's only appropriate that Vampire Rain's popularity might spike in the future as well. Then again, Dark Souls is known for being both difficult AND of top production quality, while Vampire Rain is well known for....being difficult.
5. Mobile Suit Gundam Crossfire
PS3
You know what's a good idea? Make a game based off a well-established franchise and launch it on a powerful console for its generation. You know what's a terrible idea? Developing half a game that barely functions and launching it as an example of the low points said console could go.
Mobile Suit Gundam Crossfire has largely been forgotten about by players, but it really shouldn't be. Crossfire serves as the perfect example of a hilariously misguided "valiant" effort by Bandai Namco. There's clearly effort that was put into the game, but at the same time, no effort at all.
It was regarded by some critics as "shovel-ware of the highest caliber," so it's amazing that more people aren't discussing it today. For pity's sake, if E.T. on the Atari 2600 can still be talked about, why can't this one?
4. Rambo: The Video Game
PS3, 360, Windows
Well, hello there "Sausage Links McGee." I can see you're clearly in the wrong game, as you look absolutely nothing like John Rambo. Perhaps you're looking for an old Mortal Kombat clone and got lost? No? You're here for Rambo: The Video Game? What could possibly go wrong...
Rambo: The Video Game is something nobody asked for, but we got it anyways. Developed by Teyon, notorious for the dreadful Heavy Fire: Afghanistan, Rambo is an insanely misguided attempt at bringing the franchise to video game fruition.
Whose bright idea was it to cut dialogue from the movies and use them as the voice-overs for the characters? Why would you use quick time events instead of actual stealth techniques!? At the very least, the gun-play is so run-of-the-mill that it's ultimately harmless, but the overall product certainly is not.
3. Amy
PS3, 360
Horror games that are anything but scary are the absolute best. Much like their film counterparts, when a jump scare doesn't work, all it ends up doing is making its audience laugh at the sheer stupidity of it all. In comes Amy, a "horror" game so poorly received it was forgotten about the moment it released.
What makes Amy such a perfect of horror done wrong is...well everything. It's a giant escort mission surrounding you guiding a child away from cartoonish monsters, and some of the worst combat mechanics seen in years. Just remember folks, THIS was released and is still available to download to this day, while Silent Hills was scrapped almost as fast as it was announced.
2. Ride to Hell: Retribution
PS3, 360, Windows
By now, a lot of users have likely heard about this game, thanks to YouTube critics such as ProJared and Angry Joe covering it for their channels. But really think about this game for a second. This was something that was projected to spawn a franchise, with at least two more games being planned after its release. Now look what happened to it -- the game was so hilariously terrible that the entire franchise has laid dormant since this critical failure.
If painful dialogue, loose controls, awful riding and shooting segments weren't enough to make this game "So horrendous I have to check this out," it's also blatantly sexist towards its female characters. So much so, it even gives the Atari 2600 game Custer's Revenge a run for its money.
1. Deadly Premonition
PS3, 360, Windows
Holding the Guinness world record for "most polarizing survival horror game," Deadly Premonition has all the qualities of a bad title. Cheesy dialogue, bad controls, terrible graphics -- if you can think it, it's probably there.
However, upon release many websites deemed it to be the video game equivalent of Twins Peak. Yes, it's a technically bad game clearly developed on a low budget, but there's just something about it that serves as enjoyment for those who own a copy.
Perhaps it's the mysteriously oddball murder mystery narrative woven between the glitches. Maybe there's just a lovable charm to it all. Whatever the reason may be, Deadly Premonition has received scores all over the place, ranging from a 2/10 by IGN to a 10/10 by Destructoid. Some of you who take this list into consideration may be turned off by all the bad qualities this game has to offer, but there may just be as many people who wind up loving it.
Did I miss a game you love to hate? Be sure to comment with your own suggestions below! After all, many of us love to hate terrible video games, so let's try to find as many games as we can that we hate to love!
Published: May 3, 2016 02:34 pm