Did you ever wonder what would happen if Serious Sam became a cowboy?
I didn’t either. But hey, Doctor Who made it work with a wild, wild west rendition of Robocop, who’s to say Ubisoft won’t make it gold with a game that centers around shooting people in the face? As a cowboy (sorry, “bounty hunter”). That shoots people in the face.
Django Unchained has a lot to answer for.
In Call of Juarez: Gunslinger, the latest in the Call of Juarez series, you play protagonist Silas Greaves, a bounty hunter tracking down some of the most famous outlaws in the Wild West. Such historical characters as Billy the Kid, the Dalton Brothers, Butch Cassidy, and Jesse James are name-dropped in such quick succession, you’d think it was Kim Kardashian trying to schmaltz her way into the Met.
Silas narrates his grand adventures… and like all old man stories, he’ll sometimes get a little confused. In the midst of a heated gunfight with Apache Indians, a rapt listener interrupts him and says, “Hold on, you were attacked by Apaches? What happened to the cowboys?”
With a wave of his magical memory magic, the enemies reform around you. As cowboys.
“Did I say they were Apaches? I said cowboys attacked me Apache style!”
Anything goes to get one more free drink, I guess. You can check out the latest trailer for yourself here:
What do I think?
Now, it’s hard to say. There might be a story in this. After you shoot everyone in the face. There really might be. But to me, it just looks like a slightly more polished version of the Onion’s Close Range:
And while I’m a fan of over-the-top awesome, it’s not exactly what I had in mind when I remember that once upon a time, Call of Juarez had a story—and a damned good one at that.
Do I really lack a sense of humor if I’m not wholly enthused?
Published: May 21, 2013 11:23 pm